The following is from the July/Aug issue of Utne Reader (pg. 168) who was reprinting it from "The Nose" (the tenth one). Subscriptions: $15/yr. (6 issues) from 1095 Market St., Suite 812, San Francisco, CA 94103.
THE TWO KINGS, by A. J. Jacobs
In perusing Elvis' biography "If I Can Dream" by his hairdresser-cum-spiritual adviser Larry Geller, I stumbled across the following conversation: ** Elvis begins: "Think back when I had that experience in the desert. I didn't only see Jesus' picture in the clouds--Jesus Christ literally exploded in me. Larry, it was me. I was Christ. . . I thought I might be him. I really thought I was singled out, not only to be Elvis, but, ah. . " "Elvis," [Geller] said calmly, "are you trying to say you thought you were Jesus Christ?"
Elvis, with visible relief, grinned. **
I shook my head in disbelief. Was Elvis really that out to lunch? If he was going to compare himself to a religous figure, why not try Buddha? At least they had the same body type. But, as I read further, as I dug deeper and deeper into Elvis lore, I began to notice bizarre affinities, strange parallels--inexplicable similarities between the King of Rock 'n' Roll and the King of the Jews. At first, they came to me slowly, but soon they were jumpin off the pages. Coincidence? Perhaps. * * * Jesus said, "Love thy neighbor" (Matt. 22:39). Elvis said, "Don't Be Cruel" (RCA 1956).
Jesus H. Christ has 12 letters. Elvis Presley has 12 letters.
Jesus is the Lord's shepherd. Elvis dated Cybill Shepherd.
Jesus said, "Man shall not live by bread alone" (Matt. 4:4). Elvis loved his sandwiches with peanut better and bananas.
"Then took they up stones to cast at [Jesus]" (John 8:59). Elvis was often stoned.
Jesus was the Lamb of God. Elvis had mutton chops.
Jesus was part of a Trinity. Elvis' first band was a trio.
Jesus walked on water (Matt. 14:25) Elvis surfed (Blue Hawaii, Paramount, 1965)
Jesus was a carpenter. Elvis majored in wood shop/industrial art in high school.
Jesus lived in a state of grace in a Near Eastern land. Elvis lived in Graceland in a nearly eastern state.
Jesus wore the crown of thorns. Elvis wore Royal Crown hair styler.
Jesus' entourage, the Apostles, had 12 members. Elvis' entourage, the Memphis Mafia, had 12 members
Jesus as wine (sacramental wine). Elvis as wine (Always Elvis wine by Fantenac).
A major woman in Jesus' life (Mary) had an immaculate conception. A major woman in Elvis' life (Priscilla) went to Immaculate Conception HIgh School.
Jesus was resurrected. Elvis had the famous comeback special in 1968.
Son of God Sun Studios.
Jesus said, "If any man thirst, let him come unto me, and drink" (John 7:37). Elvis said, "Drinks on me!" (Jailhouse Rock, MGM, 1957).
Jesus fasted for 40 days and nights. Elvis had irregular eating habits (e.g. five banana splits for breakfast).
Jesus is a Capricorn (December 25th). Elvis is a Capricorn (January 8th).
Jesus biography by Matthew (Gospel according to Matthew). Elvis biography by Neal Matthews (Elvis: A Golden Tribute).
"[Jesus'] countenance was like lightning, and his raiment white as snow" (Matt. 28:3). Elvis' tradmarks were a lightning bolt and snow-white jumpsuits.
Jesus was Jewish. Elvis was part Jewish (from his maternal great-grandmother, Martha Tackett Mansell).
Jesus' Purple Robe. Elvis' Pink Cadillac.
Jesus' father is everywhere. Elvis' father, Vernon, was a drifter and moved around quite a bit.
Doubting Thomas. "Suspicious Minds."
There is much confusion about Jesus' middle name--what does the "H" stand for? There is much confusion about Elvis' middle name --was it Aron or Aaron?
Jesus made rocks roll away from his tomb (Mark 16:4). Elvis was a rock 'n' roll singer.
--A. J. Jacobs.